#I just want to exist as me
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livingnotonlysurviving · 3 months ago
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Having some mixed feelings on today. On one hand I had many really lovely moments. My boyfriend and I took one of our cats for a fall walk in the cat stroller and ended up at a park with coffee and a waffle. Then I got some alone time to read when my bf saw a friend. And I went on a dinner date with my crush who was so sweet and funny. But the staff at the restaurant we went to were rude to us, trying to rush us out in a way they didn’t do to anyone else. With them rushing us we were at the restaurant for less than 30 min which just feels weird to me. I was the only Black person in the restaurant and we were the only queer couple. I love my life and how I look but often people treat me worse for being visibly trans / queer and Black.
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butchfalin · 1 year ago
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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inkskinned · 15 days ago
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okay is she being actually immature or is it just a woman over 30 expressing a human experience you find to be immature.
like yeah. at certain ages... let shit go. im not defending the real immature shit. im not defending the karen you're picturing. i worked in retail i hate those people too. (once somebody got mad at me because she didn't like how our winter window decor was a snowman smoking a pipe. i wish i was joking).
but men at 57 will write books about how 17 year old girls are soooo sexy. they will invent worlds where women have to be naked for "armor reasons." they will write songs that treat women as objects. people rush to defend them. meanwhile a woman at 35 will be like "heartbreak is hard, actually" or "i feel betrayed by a friend" or "i am struggling with something emotionally." immediately people will say stuff like this woman is 35 by the way. by the way this woman is SO OLD to be experiencing this. BY THE WAY.
im 31, almost 32. the other day a poet was blasted online because at her "big age", she had written a poem about feeling unloved. top comment was "this woman is 29 by the way." this woman is too old to still be useful, by the way. she has to behave better . maybe if she was a good wife and mother she could stop existing loudly, and the story could continue on without her. this woman has served her purpose, by the way. she's so cringe, by the way. at 29 - so old! - she still hasn't figured out that her existence should be one of shame.
#what the fuck.#unfortunately by the time i'd switched accounts (from personal to my poetry one)#i couldn't find it :(#this is why u SEND URSELF THE POST. WHICH I KNOW TO DO BUT!!!#i was so mad i just was like “i'm about to tear this commenter in twain” and . lost da post#if u urself are the 29 and got recently flamed by instagram#i love u. come here. write with me. i was about to pick up a sword for u.#i mean a BIGASS sword.#like we all know im a wlw girlie but the way ppl will be like ''id NEVER write sad poetry about a MAN not LOVING me!!!"#..... wowwwww ur so cool. anyway. people often experience emotions regardless of what u consider cringe.#& if ur gonna shame straight/bi women for feeling a certain way. hope u never write about the#weird relationship between u and ur father. or feeling different from ur brother.#or how ur male best friend fucked u over. since it's SO CRINGE. to have ANY feelings caused by a MAN#like be so for real. beloved. nobody is fucking saying this when men do it.#''oh it's cringe to like a woman or feel heartbroken by her.''#controlling women's feelings and actions???? it's more likely than u think.#btw op is nonbinary do NOT be gender essential on this post i'll kill u with my teeth#edit: btw for the person who dm'd me ''when is it misogyny and when is it actually valid''#pretty easy. if a man had done it#would it be cringe? . like if a man sang a sad song about ''she broke my damn heart''?#if he said ''i want to have kids with her'' or something sexually explicit?? like would u even LIKE IT if a male poet had said it?#& if it's like. nah a 35 yr old man being upset about this is cringe too. yeah it's just cringe. that exists. we both know it does.#but .... often i see this ONLY about women. and i can't help but hear like. how back in middle school#we were fed the lie ''girls mature faster.'' ... why do i have to be emotionally regulated? but if a man wrote about the same things?#..... idk . im pretty anti cringe culture to begin with. but this one feels so bad to me . ur still a person past 33.
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pokimoko · 2 years ago
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I can't keep being fundamentally changed as a person by animated movies, it's just not sustainable.
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ruporas · 8 months ago
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trigunned the hades or hadesed the trigun (id in alt)
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starcurtain · 3 months ago
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I think one of the funniest things about the Sabzeruz event is that the devs choose to go with Candace, Traveler, and Paimon having a whole "Ooh, two mysterious men are going into an alley to have a 'private' conversation; they must be bad guys!" only to then go "Oh just kidding, it was only Alhaitham and Kaveh doing typical Alhaitham and Kaveh things."
Except the "Alhaitham and Kaveh" thing in question this time was talking about Mehrak, a sentient robot that Kaveh built using absolutely forbidden technology, and which he then whole-heartedly willed would develop a consciousness of its own, violating one of the central taboos of his nation's governing agency, committing what amounts to an inherent and extreme felony punishable by law.
Alhaitham and Kaveh: Listen, we're not bad guys discussing illegal activity here. We're just two men having a private, personal conversation. Happens all the time.
Paimon, Candace, and Traveler: Oh cool, they're not doing a crime; they're just gay.
But they were, in fact, doing a crime.
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mythicalcoolkid · 6 months ago
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You don't wish your disability was worse or more visible, you wish your disability was taken seriously. Please stop confusing the two, I guarantee you would not get the support you need JUST by being more severe or more visible. Please listen to visibly disabled people when we tell you it isn't better on our side
#m/cc#mine#I tried extremely hard to word this nicely because I KNOW people don't mean bad and often even know there are unique challenges#and believe me I know the challenges of invisible disability too!!#I have invisible disabilities!#but as someone who has also been at least visibly 'off' since they were 10 I am SO SICK of invisible disabilities being hailed as like#a unique extra oppression that us lucky visibly disabled people don't have to deal with#there are challenges to invisible disabilities that visibly disabled people DON'T have to deal with!#but you need to understand that *the reverse is also true*#there are MASSIVE benefits to being able to lie about your disability for example#or not dealing with the overt ableism that comes with your disability being obvious to everyone#*I do not have the option to pretend I'm not disabled.* that is never an option I have#I walk weirdly. I use a mobility aid now. my speech and face are 'off.' I lean to one side#for a long time I wore sunglasses 24/7 and often didn't make sense. I sometimes can't speak or won't react to others#for the most part people will always know that at the very least something is wrong with me#and more obviously I have people telling me they'll pray for me; telling me I can't do things I'm already in the process of doing;#wanting to shake my hand to tell me I'm an inspiration for not killing myself; giving me dirty looks for existing in public#and yes. I'm aware that this is very much an in-community issue. I know the average abled person doesn't know invisible disabilities exist#that's why there's so much awareness happening for it#but as a visibly disabled person I get SO TIRED of constantly hearing 'I wish my disability was visible :'('#it's just 'I wish I had your disability!' but from other disabled people
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bearsandswears · 8 months ago
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Revisiting the conversation you can have with Gale about Halsin’s proposition. I think it should be worse.
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tawnysoup · 8 months ago
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Learning to accept support
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egophiliac · 6 months ago
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YOU MANIFESTED THE TWEEL CARDS CONGRATS
YOU'RE WELCOME EVERYBODY!
seriously though I was probably like. 60-80% thinking we'd get at least one tweel for chapter 10. but I was NOT expecting it so soon! both of 'em! in August! a shame we're not getting a Coral Sea event after all...but I guess I can be resigned to that and ALSO excited for getting shiny sparkly glowing(!!!!) mertwins along with Azul fighting his inner demons and going right for the eyes! AHHHH I CAN'T WAIT
(also heeeey I recognize that rowboat... 👀)
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azuronel · 3 months ago
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my predictions for the end of book 7
EDIT: part two here
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dreamyluigi · 1 month ago
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something something luigi doesn't remember the final events of spm or dimentio at all after he's defeated (but mario remembers everything)
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discocandles · 1 month ago
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one thing about steve harrington is that he sucks at doing nothing. like he has to be doing something with himself lest the guy waste away. this has led to him being very good at fucking around with things especially when its something relatively quiet. the loudest steve will let himself keep his hands busy while stuck idle is tossing whatever's in his hand to himself and catching it, which usually bodes well for sports practice after coach learned that just because he was moving didnt mean he wasnt paying attention(usually the opposite).
he learned how to flip a pencil around his thumb in middle school and seeing someone in one of the meetings he sat in on doing it. he'll twirl anything he can around in his hand, especially while he was working in the mall. the scoopers were perfect for it. and any way youve seen a drummer/percussionist fiddle with a drumstick, steve knew he had to replicate it.
but even with all this movement and the fact the guy was barely ever not moving, it seemed like no one noticed it ever. a fact that nearly drove eddie insane when they were in high school together. because he did have the reputation of being restless, and in a constant state of movement. and he probably fucked around with random shit less, so how did steve "the hair" harrington not end up with the same reputation? the answer was just that he was way more quiet("and sneaky" -eddie) about it. and if the teacher hated when their students fiddled and futzed he'd be sure to try and keep the movement below his desk.
but it not that he only has to keep his hands busy. no no no, if bored or stuck waiting, and that won't suffice, steve harrington will pick up anything with words just to read it. anything. outdated newspapers, ingredients lists, magazines of any topic. he just mindlessly grabs for whatever and starts fucking reading. Robin could swear under oath to a court that her best friend has read the back of every vhs in family video. hell, she's seen him reading drugstore novels, like the fucking grandma smut and books with cover art of nicely dressed ladies running from a castle. and its her jock best friend reading it, instead of some repressed suburban woman who hates her husband. yes, this information is the bane of robin buckley's exsistance because its not like anyone would believe her.
idk just give me steve being restless but doing it quietly enough that no one really picks up on it.
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magicpiano · 4 months ago
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AU where the justice league finds out that Captain Marvel is homeless. Not Billy, they still have no idea about the captain's secret identity, but the Captain.
Maybe they were discussing a case or something, and he says something that is just a little too knowledgeable. Something only someone who has been there would know. He tries to backtrack when he realizes that he said too much, tries to explain that getting a job and an apartment is hard when you do hero work which doesn't pay (and hopes they don't find out the real reason he can't get a job is because no one will hire a kid).
The league comes to the conclusion the reason he is so secretive about his identity is because he is ashamed he is homeless. Naturally, everyone immediately feels super bad about this and tries to help him much to his dismay.
Identity shenanigans ensue.
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ankles-be-bitten · 1 month ago
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idk, i just feel like if your primary argument against transandrophobia/antitransmasculinity theory is that you think it's transmisogynistic you're not being intellectually honest. who does it hurt when trans men and mascs coin a term to describe the intersection of transphobia and sexism as it most frequently affects them? because it does hurt trans men when they're told that they're not entitled to speak on the discrimination they themselves face.
what I'm hearing from people who oppose the antitransmasculinity movement is that transmisogyny is when trans men talk about their problems 👍, but obviously that's not true. i know that's not true. you know that's not true. so then what is the issue? genuinely, enlighten me. you want trans men to shut up and listen? I'm listening.
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iizuumi · 7 months ago
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Side effects of wearing your sentient Kaiju suit too often ,,,,
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